Bayonetta got a haircut.
More news as this story develops.
**UPDATE**
Bayonetta's hair still short.
**UPDATE UPDATE**
From my exclusive interview with Samra, my barber:
Samra: Hair takes a long time to grow.
Kris: So, chances are, if Bayonetta cut her hair, there's not much of a chance it will grow back.
Samra: No, it'll grow back. It'll just take a few weeks.
Kris: So her hair may be long again by the time the game launches.
Samra: Well, if she was a real person, yes. But I'm not sure it works that way with video games.
Kris: I'm not sure what you mean.
Hair expected to grow back, possibly in time for release date.
**UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE**
Nintendo confirms Bayonetta not real person. Team of technology specialists conclude hair expected to be short at time of release.
**UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE**
Photographic evidence from the news desk:
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Our pundits weigh in on Bayonetta getting a haircut.
Cosmo Frill (editor, Negative World Style): She's obviously feeling more confident. A woman who gets this sort of haircut is saying, "I'm here. I'm making my own choices. You can't deny me." Bayonetta's a survivor and she wants the world to know it.
Jefferson Gashbag (editor, Negative World Politics): Frankly, I don't know who she thinks she is fooling. She's showing a dangerous lack of core American values. All women should have long hair. That's what my grandpappy told me and I live my entire life based on what my grandpappy told me.
Chris Right (editor, Negative World Casual Encounters): I think she looks totally hot this way. (Howls like a wolf. Falls out of his chair. Knocks himself out cold.)
**UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE**
Bayonetta's name taken from the word "bayonet" which, according to Negative World's Military Analyst, my Dad, is a sort of gun that shoots knives. The "etta" part is probably a reference to jazz singer Etta James.
**UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE**
Etta James had short hair, too. Coincidence? We report, you decide.
**UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE**
Bayonetta's hair still short.
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